Had a New EEG Test Yesterday

I had my second EEG test yesterday, but my reactions to it were considerably different from the one I had two years ago. Back then, my Neurologist was trying to decide if I had Parkinson's or not. My only symptom at that time was a very labored, slow walk, that he called Bradykinesia. I did not have any problems with the EEG test at all.

Things have changed a good bit since then. Now I have lots of tremors, jerks, and facial tics, that only get worse if I am in a stressful situation, or cannot get my mind "somewhere else". I have discovered that when I am deeply concentrating on something, such as writing here on the computer, that the movements are quieted down considerably.

But put me in a situation that is the least stressful, or in one where I am just sitting with nothing actively going on, and I turn into the hurky jerky girl. Church is the usual place that happens. The only way to stop it that I have found is to go into a meditative state, finding some minute crack or spot on the wall to give my total attention to. It spaces me out, I don't hear the sermon, but at least I am not bothering all the people who sit behind us.

And now I know that it happens during EEG tests, too. With nothing to occupy my concentration, following her directions to do fast open mouth breathing for 3 minutes to make me hyperventilate, and some very uncomfortable series of strobe lights that made me feel even more stressed, there just wasn't any way to stop the jerks. The harder I tried to be still, as she had asked, the more I moved. She finally gave up and said at least it would let the doctors see what my brain was doing while my body was doing its own thing. She did tell me to open my mouth and stop pressing my lips together, so my mouth trembled and pulled to the left the whole time, too.

It took 45 minutes to complete the test, and I was exhausted the rest of the day.

The funny part was my hair!! They do not use the scull cap method, so each of these electrodes was stuck to my scalp with something like KY jelly. And there were lots of electrodes - maybe in the 20's? When she was through and told me to look in the mirror, I looked like something from a Monty Python movie. I smoothed my hair down as best I could, but would have loved to have walked out just as I was, so hubby could get a kick out of it. If he had been the only one in the waiting room I would have, but it was a very busy place.

We were set to drive some distance to a family funeral after the test, so I had anticipated the hair goo and planned to stop at any franchise hair salon along the way and get my hair washed. So that was easily enough taken care of. I am glad I knew to expect that, as it could have been a real problem if we had been running short on time. I didn't appreciate having to pay $12 just to get it washed and blown dry with no styling, but there wasn't anything else to do. I had also brought a complete change of clothes and shoes, so I would not have to take the test in good clothes.

We did get into a situation of some very expensive parking at UAB, though, that just added to the very expensive day. We parked in the closest parking deck to the Sparks Clinic at UAB, but they would not validate his ticket, since we had not used the "right" deck. Of course, they had not told me that I should park in any particular one when they called to tell me the appointment time. So, instead of costing $4.50 to park, it cost us $15.00!!! We were not at all happy about that!! UAB will be hearing from me about that today!!

When we did get to Cleveland, the little town in north Alabama where the funeral was going to be, we ate at a very nice looking local restaurant. Not surprisingly, considering the way the rest of the day had been, their prices were high. So, we took the lunch special of the day. The vegetables were great, but the meat was lousy. The waitress seemed genuinely shocked when hubby complained about it.

I really was worn out by the time the graveside funeral was over, so we begged off on eating at the church with the family and headed straight home. This was my sister in law's side of the family, so I really didn't know that many people there anyway, and I am not comfortable in unfamiliar social situations. I have always been that way, but it's gotten worse now that I jerk and twitch so much.

So we had a full day, one that I am glad to have over with. I have an appointment with Dr. Watt's team in May, with an MRI to be schedules before then, so I will have to wait that long to find out the results of the EEG. Should be very revealing, since I displayed the full range of all my jerks, tics, smirks, and shakes while the brain's electrical activity was being graphed.

I am optimistic that all these tests are going to show more than they did two years ago, and that they will be able to decide what is wrong with me with more certainty. Of course, I know there is no such thing medically in life as a certainty, but I can rely on God to get me through it all. Patience, Rosemary, Patience.

Re-Testing Peripheral Neuropathy Monday

I see the MDS specialist the first week of April, so it seemed like a good idea to ask for a Neuropathy test before I see him. When I first saw my Neurologist, it was at the suggestion of my Orthopedist, who had concluded that my super labored walking was not caused by lumbar disk pressure.

He sent me to Lakeshore to have the Nerve Conduction Velocity Test, which uses patches like those they stick on the chest to check for heart problems. They pass an electric current and check to see how long it takes the message to register between the patches. It's uncomfortable at the time, but not really too bad. The other test is called Electromyography. That's the one where they poke electrodes the size of needles in your muscles, and it is supposed to show how well the muscles respond when the nerve is stimulated. That test is not at all comfortable. I actually had little pin prick size blood spots all over my legs when that one was over.

Anyway, the results showed definite Axonal Peripheral Neuropathy, mostly in my right leg. Because I was having trouble walking, and the test order came as a result of my Ortho dealing with my back and legs, he did not order the test to be done on my arms as well.

My Neuro was not at all happy that he did not have results for my arms as well as my legs, but he proceeded with the info he had, as my insurance would not likely have paid for a repeat test so soon.

So, I talked to his nurse a couple of days ago, and I'm scheduled to have the complete PN test battery Monday, at my "suggestion" - translate that as strong urging. This test is very uncomfortable, but it seems to me I need to get any tests done now, not wait and "waste" the visit with this very hard to see Head of Neurology at UAB.

I'm still experimenting with any variables I can think of. so, for the last four days I have not used the TAP dental device, which is to control my mild Sleep Apnea. The mouth tics started about the same time I started using the TAP, and I'm trying to be sure that this off and on again mouth twitching I've been doing is not being aggravated by the mouthpiece. Surprisingly, I'm still sleeping 7 or 8 hours a night, even without it. I think it did break me of the mouth breathing habit, which may be the cause of the relaxed jaw that was allowing my throat to close up during sleep.

I have noticed a definite correlation between the mouth twitches or tics and how stressed or tired I am. So they get worse as the day goes on. If I stop to think about them, I can stop them momentarily, but it's as if my mouth is determined to move, no matter what I do, and it soon starts back up again.

I figure I'll make sure Monday that there aren't any other tests I should have done, or repeat, before seeing Dr. Watts at UAB. I have to call his office to change my insurance information to show that Medicare is my Primary insurance now, as this is the month I turn 65. So I will talk to his nurse and see if they suggest any other tests. I have learned to be proactive in such situations. It amazes me that doctor's offices don't initiate this kind of pre-visit planning, but they don't.

By way of contrast, when we made an appointment with a financial counselor to help us with investing my inheritance, we received a huge packet of papers to fill out and a long list of documents to bring with us for our first meeting. That's the way it should be with doctors, in my opinion.

So, I will do what I can to document everything and have everything ready for this crucial visit. I can't even talk to someone about Long Term Care insurance, or anything insurance related, until I have a diagnosis. No insurance company in their right mind would take me on as a customer right now.

Tax Time is looming, and that's one thing I am dreading doing, but I can't put it off much longer. Oh, did you know that people who file an extension will NOT receive this stimulus package $300 thingy they all keep talking about? I have always filed on time, but I know some people habitually delay it, and might need to know that.

I continue to work to get our inventory of plush lovies online, and we have managed to help several families get replacements for lost toys lately, which is extremely satisfying. I'm also helping to beta test a new Mood community on Patients Like Me, and finding the charting of my own moods to be interesting.

I may be twitching, but I am in a good mood today, and that's a great way to end this post.

Life Goes ON

My Physical Therapy office called yesterday, and the appointment is set for Jan.2, so that's taken care of. I have been scouring the Internet, looking for some indication of the meaning of some of the neurological tests my Neuro did on me in his office the other day, but still not having any luck. I think I will end up calling his nurse, and see if she can help me understand what happened. We were both just in shock, I think, in his office, and I didn't ask enough questions. Now I could kick myself for not asking dozens!!

Also, I am wondering if I should try to wean myself off of the meds he left me on, before I see the MDS in April. And I also need to ask if there are any tests that my Neuro should be scheduling before then, too. When I first went to Dr. S, he was less than pleased to see that the Peripheral Neuropathy tests I had already had were only on my legs. They did not test my arms. So it would seem logical to me to have that workup done again, but more thoroughly, sometime close to my appointment in April. Otherwise, I can just see it now. I'll go in and talk to this fellow, walk, and get poked and prodded, and then he will order a bunch of tests, and I won't see him again for another 4 months. This NOT KNOWING could last the better part of a year, if that's the way it plays out.

I have been blessed with so many wonderful net friends showing their support and concern over all these mixed up feelings I am having. It's humbling to know that all of you are out there, praying for me. With all that love coming my way, and God's help, I am already beginning to ease out of the horrible funk this news put me in. I can choose to believe I have something worse than PD, or not. I choose NOT, doggonit!!

So, another Friday has rolled around. It feels a little different, with this uncertainty surrounding us, but we will find something enjoyable to do today, and life will go on. Our Christmas stocking gift hunt is finally ended, and it's time to wrap the presents for the grandkids, and our children, too. I haven't looked yet to see if there are any Estate Sales today, but I kind of doubt it. Who knows, we might go see another movie.

We enjoyed "Perfect Holiday" last week, as a light, entertaining, feel good movie, regardless of what the critics had to say about it. And we'll probably end up seeing "Legion" today, even though the critics have panned it, too. Not every movie has to be Academy Award quality to be enjoyed, right? Although I am a little surprised that Will Smith allowed himself to be in a movie that was less than box office hit quality. From what I've read, it's the Zombies that are so poorly done, not his performance. And there are some flaws with the premise of the story, too, which is what makes Science Fiction work as a genre. Once you have decided to "believe" in a certain situation, the rest of the story must stay true to that premise. From what the critics say, this one does not, and that's a pity. But, flaws and all, I am sure I will enjoy it, as I really like his acting, and I am a Science Fiction buff from way back.

So our lives move along, and I will try to let go of these nagging thoughts, and look on the bright side of it all. I look forward to spending time with our family on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, and not think beyond that for now. Here's wishing you all a very happy Christmas time with your families, too!

This is a Hard Post to Write

I saw my Neurologist yesterday, and it turns out I did have good reason to be apprehensive about the appointment.

First of all, he agreed that I did not have any business having the epidurals on my cervical vertebrae. So, I called my Orthopedist to let them know that they could schedule the Physical Therapy, but not the epidurals. They called back later, and have already faxed the prescription to the PT I used last time, which is close to home. So, hopefully, I will be getting some relief from the neck pain and stiffness soon. Holidays, of course, will be in the way of a regular schedule, so who knows when I will actually start the sessions. It could easily be the beginning of next year.

He also took me off of the Levadopa/Carbidopa plus Lodosyn meds that the ER doc had added to my treatment, since it didn't seem to be helping much at all. Taking too much of these meds can cause dyskinesia, which is involuntary movements. That may be why I had such an odd tremor develop of late, plus all the facial and tongue tics I have been experiencing.

But the news from the exam that has me so upset right now is that he is no longer sure I have Parkinson's. He watched me walk, and I was so nervous by then that he got to see me at my worst. Both legs bobbing up and down like I was trying to walk across the floor of one of those carnival blow up bounce machines, and having to hold out my arms to the sides to keep my balance. Turning around and coming back towards him was just as bad. He had me take off my socks and shoes, and he did all the usual hitting with the hammer. He scraped the bottom of each foot, and also suddenly pushed both feet straight up several times, in a slapping kind of motion.

I have had the foot scrape thing done many times before, and I know what that was testing me for - the Babinski effect. That's a test I failed some years ago when I was seeing a different Neurologist for migraine headaches. As far as I know I have not failed it since then. It has to do with the way your toes curl or straighten out when a hard object is scraped from the heel towards the toes. The normal reflex is to curl the toes inward. If the toes spread out, with the big toe stretching upward, it's a sign of a lower extremity nerve problem. I don't know if I passed it this time or not. He didn't say, and I was too upset to ask. I have tried to look up what the sudden slapping of my feet upward meant, as I have never had that done to me before, but I haven't been able to come up with the right search terms yet to find out what that was all about. He did move my arms around, while I kept them relaxed, and said he did not feel any cog wheeling. That's something he would expect to find if I had Parkinson's, and he has said in the past that he did feel it. It has something to do with the tremors, but that's about all I know about cog wheeling.

They have made an appointment for me with the Chair of the Neurology Department at the University of Alabama in Birmingham. He is the Movement Disorder Specialist in this area, and is supposed to be my best chance of finding out what is wrong with me. Parkinson's effects people in so many different ways, it may yet turn out to be the PD that my Neuro had initially diagnosed.

But for now, he has listed my diagnosis as the Peripheral Neuropathy plus Gait Debility. I'm back to that "not knowing" stage, and it is extremely upsetting for me, and for my dear sweet hubby. Of course, as you might expect with the chair of the department, I can't get an appointment until the end of April. That's going to be a long, long wait that is not going to be easy.

I felt such relief when my Neuro put a name to what was happening to me - even if it was that I had Parkinson's. Now I am in limbo again, and I hate it.

Hubby has asked that I stop reading and researching about Parkinson's for awhile, just to be sure that I have not been subconsciously absorbing the symptoms that I was reading about. That's a fair request, so I have said a temporary goodbye to my Parkie friends on PatientsLikeMe, and will not be doing any PD research for awhile. I am going to continue to try to find out more about Peripheral Neuropathy, though, because there is no doubt that I have that. Unlike Parkinson's, there are definitive tests for PN, which I most definitely have.

I don't know how to adequately explain how I am feeling about all this right now. It's almost as if I found out I was adopted, or something like that. It's like my identity has been ripped to shreds, if that makes sense. I have developed some really close friendships with some wonderful PWP over the last year. Now, with one sentence, my Neuro has put the nature of that relationship in limbo.

This NOT KNOWING stage I am in again is very hard to deal with. I am vacillating between being scared of something worse than Parkinson's, and being relieved that it could be something less progressive in nature than PD.

God is forever trying to teach me patience, and reliance on Him, rather than my own abilities. Looks like He is working on that big time right now. We haven't actually said anything out loud, but I think hubby and I are going to keep this turn of events to ourselves for now. I can't see any good reason to add this uncertainty to our children's lives. They have enough to worry about on their own. So, I will pour out my feelings here on my blog, since no one who knows me personally ever reads it.

Two Ruptured Cervical Disks - No Wonder I'm Hurting!

I talked with my Orthopedist's PA the other day, and she confirmed what I already knew. The disks are bulging on the two cervical vertebrae that are degenerating, and that's what is causing the pain and stiffness. She doesn't want to make an anesthesiologist appointment to get an epidural there until I have a chance to talk to my Neurologist. I see him Wednesday. I did ask that she talk to my Neuro's nurse, rather than expect me to relay messages. It seems that the ER did not send any information to him about my time in the ER in September, when I had the horrible drug interaction with a steroid shot. So his nurse was completely surprised to hear I had a bad reaction.

So, we'll be going to the hospital to sign the release form to get the records to take to my Neuro.

I continue to be concerned and in prayer for several Parkie buddies on the PatientsLikeMe site, who have been diagnosed with skin cancers. One has Melanoma, and the other has Squamous Cell Cancer. Both were caught early, with every reason to believe they will be just fine. We are all praying for their recovery.

There is another woman on there who's brother also has PD, who had unrelated surgery, and to quote her - "his brain is mush." She said he has already tried to leave the hospital. When I thought I was going to have to have surgery back a few months ago, I learned all kinds of scary things about how difficult it is for PWP to have any kind of anesthesia without serious side effects. Also, it is very difficult to get hospitals to keep the PD meds coming on time. And that can mean the difference between being mobile and thinking normally, and not.

I wore my new "Sunday" shoes today, and I really like them. They help with my balance, they feel good on, and they are unobtrusive. I doubt if anyone has even noticed that I'm not wearing dress shoes. I don't feel the least bit self conscious in them, so if someone has noticed them - I don't care.

I am having one problem, though, that came unexpectedly. Last night I noticed a red itchy place on my wrist where the back of the Timex watch is against my skin. I had noticed that the skin was getting slick and shiny there a couple of weeks ago, so I started taking it off at night to go to sleep. Evidently I didn't heed the warning in time, as I now have a nice round ringworm there. It's been holding too much moisture against my skin, as it is fairly tight. It's a big man size watch, and not particularly comfortable, but I was willing to tolerate it, because it is so helpful. I may end up taking the band off, and just keeping it in my pocket.

I have not been able to do much exercising for the last month, partly because of my neck, but mostly because my DH over did it and his Sciatica is acting up again. I've been so busy working on the requests on our Plush Memories blog that I have been sitting still more than I probably should be. I've not been doing the Tai Chi, either. I know I really need to get back with a scheduled exercise program, the way I was before.

So, some things improve, while other new aggravations begin. Not so different than what happens to everyone, right?

Sitting MRI and a Full Night's Sleep

Well, I had my Standing MRI on my neck yesterday. I was having some strong tremors when I got there, so the technician changed it to a Sitting MRI! LOL!! He also put a lightly restraining halo on my head, and I managed to stay still through the whole 30 minutes. He said I did just fine.

Of course I won't find out anything until next week probably. I'm guessing that he will prescribe Physical Therapy again, particularly since I had such a terrible reaction to the Celestone steroid shot for my poison ivy. It depends on just how much damage he sees, I guess.

I have my Neurologist appointment next week, so I will be talking to him about how I should proceed. He may have me stop taking the Zelepar, as that seems to be the med that gives me the most interaction warnings. It does not play well with others!

I have an appointment with my Sleep Apnea Specialist next week, too. He should be dismissing me, hopefully. I am sleeping a full 8 hours almost every night now. And it has made a miraculous difference in my daytime sleeping. Actually, I'm not having ANY daytime sleeping problems, now. I can ride in the car for hours now, and still carry on a conversation with my DH. It's been years since I could do that. No more jerking awake at the computer from a few seconds of sound sleep out of nowhere. And, I am still on the Requip that gets blamed for this side effect. It wasn't the medicine after all for me. I was just sleep deprived!

It's so gratifying to see improvement even in one area of my health. And I have high hopes that Dr. J will fix the pain and stiffness in my neck.

Standing MRI Tomorrow / Praying for Friends

Hubby went off yesterday morning to his stint on Jury Duty, only to be sent back home. All the cases for this week had been handled through plea bargains, and there were no cases!! He had to call back last night to see if anything had changed, and they dismissed all the jurors!!

So, I got busy making arrangements to have my MRI done, and it is scheduled for tomorrow. I'm going to call my Neurologist's office today and see if they have any suggestions, because it dawned on me that with this standing MRI, I would need to be still for quite awhile. That was not a problem with the knee MRI I had done at this same place. I was not having foot and leg tremors then, but I am now.

It just seems like this PD manages to worm its way into every single thing I try to do.

I shouldn't be whining, though, as I am so much better off than some of my Parkie friends are. It grieves me, for their sakes, to read of all the pain and problems that PD is causing some wonderful people that I care deeply about on the PLM forum and on the PD blogs I keep up with. I keep them in the forefront of my prayers daily.

Hubby and I are also extremely concerned about a young teen aged, very gifted and sweet boy from our church, who is seriously ill. He went to the doctor Friday, but the doctor ran all kinds of tests and could not find anything to explain how sick he felt, and sent him back home.

Saturday he was in the hospital with pneumonia. Monday, he was put in ICU, and yesterday he was airlifted to the ICU at Children's Hospital in Birmingham.

This single mom has a Downs Syndrome child, as well, so attending to the needs of both of them must be putting all kinds of extra strain on her during this scary time. Thankfully, she has family living nearby who can help her out. We spent a few minutes with him in the ICU yesterday, only to come home and find out about the airlift. I talked to her for just a moment or two in the ICU waiting room at Children's last night, and she sounded OK, but I imagine she is faking a lot of that calm.

So, I feel very small and insignificant at times like this, with my petty little problems. All we can do is keep them in our prayers, and offer to help in any way we can.

Update on Dental Appliance for Sleep Apnea

I've been wearing the TAP device for the last three nights, and thought I'd better let you know what I think of it. All in all I'm very pleased. It's certainly easier for me than trying to get used to the CPAP mask was. I would be lying if I said it is comfortable, but it's not painful and I am pretty sure I will eventually wear it without particularly noticing it. I guess it's about like wearing glasses for the first time.

There are a few things that have to be part of my routine now, because of the dental appliance. It is absolutely a must that I brush my teeth every night, something I've never really had a consistent habit about, hanging my head in shame, as I usually fall asleep in the recliner while watching TV. If I don't, I'm just asking for a bunch of cavities. Also, I have to brush the mouth pieces every morning when I brush my teeth, and leave them out to dry thoroughly.

The big change is that there are two small pieces of pliable plastic that I have to stick in between my teeth at the corners of my mouth every morning to chew on for awhile. The idea is that the TAP pulls the lower jaw forward for sleeping, so in the morning, I have to move my lower jaw back into it's normal position, so my bite will be correct. It's kind of like chewing gum, I guess, but there's no taste. It's not hard to do, but it's absolutely necessary. It's supposed to strengthen my jaw muscles, too, which will be a good Parkinson's exercise. PWP lose the ability to control their facial muscles eventually, so this should help me forestall the expressionless Parkinson's Mask, as it's called.

I haven't made any turns on the device yet, so I'm still wearing it at the first setting, which has my upper and lower teeth meeting in the front. Now, for some of you, they already do that to begin with, but I have a noticeable overbite. That overbite is one of the main reasons my Sleep Disorder doctor thinks this dental appliance will stop my Sleep Apnea. I figure I'm going to be wearing this thing the rest of my life, so what's the rush. I want to get used to it first, before I start cranking my jaw out any further, particularly since it's already set to move my lower jaw out a good bit just to make my front teeth meet.

As far as my sleeping goes, I haven't been doing much of that. I don't really think it's because of the dental appliance, though. I've taken Lunesta two nights now, and still didn't sleep more than three or four hours. I made it to five hours last night, without a sleeping pill, which is the best this week. I've never found a sleeping pill that really worked well enough on me to justify taking it, so I can't say I'm surprised the Lunesta didn't help.

I've been pretty upset with other things that have been going on with my Parkinson's right now, and I think that's cutting into my sleep. Also, I'm on several more PD meds since my ER visit, and they may be making the insomnia worse. And, even with the extra meds, I'm still wobbly, although nowhere near as bad as I was before I went to the ER.

I am having some spells of being extremely spacey and unsteady, which pass after about an hour or so, usually right after meals. I'm guessing it's the combination of all the PD meds I'm on right now, but my Neurologist will straighten that out for sure. I have them all spread out as best I could, so I'm taking something about every hour or two all day long.

I see my Neurologist tomorrow, and I'm very hopeful that he can sort out what needs to be done to help the insomnia and also give my Gastroenterologist some suggestions about medicines I can take to calm the colon spasms. He may have to change some of my PD meds, so that I can take an antidepressant, as that is the class of drugs that the colon relaxing medicines fall in. Oh, I forget to mention that I stopped taking the St. John's Wort after the first day, as the more I read I realized it was in the category of an antidepressant, and I can't take those right now.

So I'll spend today looking forward to tomorrow and some answers, I hope!

Walking on Jello

The saga of drug interactions continues, evidently. I had a Celestone shot on Thursday to get the poison ivy under control, as a steroid shot always does the trick for me. My regular doctor has given these to me several times in the last few years, so I was not surprised when I woke up very nervous Friday. That's pretty much par for the course, plus they make it hard for me to sleep, too. So, I tolerated the shakiness Friday, and we continued with our Estate Sale hunting and went to see our younger DD for an overnight stay.

By Saturday morning I was even shakier, but we had a long way to drive home. I kept the way I was feeling to myself, figuring it would go away, and I did feel better after we ate a big breakfast. But, this morning, I was in really bad shape. I was shaking all over and holding on to furniture and the walls to get around. When my hubby got up several hours after me, I was worse. So, I called the Neurologist's answering service and the doctor on call promptly called me back. After listening to all this, he told me to go to the ER. He said he was concerned it was an infection (I didn't think so, but?) and they would be able to give me something to stop the tremors. So, we were off for the hour long drive to get to the ER, with DH trying his best not to show just how worried he was about me, and me trying my best to be still.

They took me right away, but it still took quite awhile to get the results from all the blood work they did. They did not find signs of any infection, and concluded, just as I had, that the steroid shot had precipitated this acceleration of my symptoms. So, armed with four prescriptions and orders to see my Neurologist this week, they sent me home.

So, at least for now, I'm back on Sinemet, which is the "Gold Standard" drug for Parkinson's. Since I was so nauseated with it when I took it for the Sinemet Challenge that confirmed my Parkinson's diagnosis, I had asked the ER doctor to also give me a prescription for Lodosyn, Carafate, and Phenergan. This is where my journal of everything that has happened since my diagnosis came in handy. I was able to show him in my journal that this is what my own Neurologist had put me on way back in September of 2006, when I got so nauseated with the Sinemet.

So, I'm typing this with a fairly steady hand, with all these extra meds in my system. I have an appointment tomorrow with my Gastroenterologist to find out what he thinks is going on with my digestive tract, and as soon as I know what is going on in that area, I will make an appointment to see my Neurologist.

This whole experience has been very upsetting to say the least, not only for me, but for DH as well. I hate it that he's having to take care of me the way he's had to. I hate it that I couldn't stop myself from shaking. I hate it that the ER guard came immediately, being so very solicitous, wanting to get me a wheelchair, as I was obviously so feeble looking, wobbly cane and all. I hate being this way. Today I got a glimpse of what the future holds. I hate it.

Trying a Different C-Pap Mask

I took the c-pap stuff back to the supplier yesterday, and they have changed me to a very soft nasal "plug" that doesn't have nearly as much strapping all over my face as the nasal mask did. I slept 6 straight hours, without getting up at all. I can't remember how long it's been since I did that. It's not perfect, as my nostrils were sore this morning, and I can still feel the thing, even hours after it has been out. I've always had this odd thing where I could "feel" a hat long after I had taken it off, and this canula is doing the same thing.

I have hope now that I will adjust. The frustration I was feeling with the other face mask was really wearing me out. It's a good thing I don't cuss! LOL

I'm calling the Gastroenterologist today, as I want the colonoscopy for my peace of mind. I'm still not satisfied with my elimination situation. We took our kittens to the vet this morning, and I got light headed and had to sit down quickly, because we were standing, waiting for the vet to come in our treatment room. I blame that on my tummy, as I felt better after I excused myself and used their facilities.

I've started going out in our yard and working just as soon as it's daylight, as it's just too hot later on in the morning. So, my exercise routine is back on track, with walking and Tai Chi every day, plus working for a little while in the yard. By the time I come in around 7:00AM I'm drenched in sweat.

I'm definitely going to have to get my Neurologist to prescribe something to stop this excessive crying I'm doing. I broke out in blubbering at the c-pap office, trying to tell the tech how frustrated I was trying to adjust to the mask. I have learned that this is called emotional lability, and it is a PD side effect. He doesn't want to change my meds until I get the cpap and elimination situations settled, and that makes sense.

So, some things seem to be getting better, and others aren't.

Getting a Sleep Study Done

I went to see my Neurologist yesterday, and he is very pleased with my physical progress. He doesn't want to change any of my meds, though, until I have had a sleep study. So, I have an appointment in July with a Sleep Disorder specialist. I'm not sure what that kind of doctor is called, but they gave me a book's worth of forms to fill out about myself that I have to have done for the appointment. I'm surprised they didn't ask me if I painted my toenails!!

I've been doing a little research about this insomnia thing and Parkinson's, and it's no wonder that this is bothering me. Something like 88% of PWP complain of insomnia!! Whether it's the disease or the meds we take, I'm not sure, but that's a significant symptom to deal with.

I have recently bought two more books that I think are going to be very helpful. One is Parkinson's - The Art of Moving, by John Argue, and the other is The Book of Exercise and Yoga for Those with Parkinson's Disease, by Lori Newell, M.A., which shows how to do each exercise from a chair if the PWP requires it. Add the Chi Walking book I've mentioned before, by Danny and Catherine Dryer, to that list, and I think any Parkie would find help with improving their body mechanics. I found used copies of the first two on Amazon recently, and I bought the walking book at a local book store. Thanks to Tami for suggesting the Art of Moving book.

DH mentioned last night that the slope of our newly installed home "track" makes it harder for him to get in as many steps as he does on the track at the local park. And I thought it was just me.

We now have extended our driveway around to the side of our house, with a new garage to be built next week, hopefully. But we didn't stop there. We had them put in a side walk to underneath our deck, and had a patio put in there. There's only about a five foot pathway between the end of the patio and the beginning of the sidewalk that goes from the deck steps to the front driveway that we need to finish with stepping stones.

That means we essentially have our own personal track now. We get an up and down slope going to and from the back yard, as we have a full daylight basement, with plenty of level walking up front and on the new driveway. Now I can step outside during the day and go around a time or two any time I get stiff or need a break from working on the computer. I'm not supposed to sit still more than about 15 minutes at a time, according to the Art of Moving book, so this is great. I think that's also why sitting through church bothers me so much. I can't wiggle enough in the pew to stay comfortable LOL!!

DH is walking between two and three miles each day we go to the track, but he's not able to do much else in the way of exercising. He had colon cancer several years ago, and the whole incision, from way above the navel all the way down, herniated last year. He has this huge piece of mesh sewn into his abdomen to hold it all together. You can actually see the bulge in his tummy where the muscles are just not able to support his mid section. The doctor cautioned him not to do crunches or anything similar, so it's hard for him to slim his middle down. He's pretty much stopped wearing trousers with belts, as they are just not comfortable.

So, I'm glad that my Parkinson's is giving him the motivation to walk consistently. He's a night owl, and if it weren't for getting up to keep me walking, I don't think he would get up early on his own. And, of course, it's way too hot to walk much around here unless you go very early. We are usually at the track by 6:00AM, with plenty of other walkers already going around when we get there. On days he doesn't feel like getting up that early, he's been walking around our own track as late as 10:00 at night!! So, we're helping each other to stay motivated, and that's a good thing.

Still NO Sleep

Insomnia is turning out to be my biggest problem right now, because it effects my stamina and mental agility as the day wears on. I start out each morning all fresh and energetic, even with only 4 hours sleep. I'm wide awake and rarin' to go! But I fizzle. Not surprising considering it's been over a month since I've had more than 4 hours a night. I doze in the car when we go anywhere, but other than that, there's nothing.

My Neurologist appointment is coming next week, and he had mentioned doing a sleep study. I think it's time, don't you?? I can't imagine what he can do about it, though, as I'm comfortable in the recliner, and if I snore, there's no one nearby to tell me about it LOL. I do hear my DH sawing away in the bedroom, though. Ah! Maybe HE's the culprit!! ROTFL

I'm really proud of how much stronger physically I am right now, and I'm determined to keep up the good work. I'm doing the Tai Chi almost every day, which definitely improves my balance, walking about 6000 steps on average, lifting 1 lb weights to do the arm exercises, and working around the house more than I have in a long time.

We're about to close on Daddy's house, so that will be out of the way. That leaves his car and all the stuff in the house to get rid of, plus some small insurance policies to deal with. UGH!

I continue to stay behind on all my computer work, but the eBay business is picking up, now that I'm listing new items every day. Maybe in the year 2020 I'll have all of the things we have been buying at Estate Sales sold. HA! Maybe ... but we keep on buying, 'cause that's the fun part for us, as we do that together. One step forward and two steps back! All the online part is strictly my doings. Hubby can't stand computers.

I really do miss all of you, but I just can't work it all in. I don't think I think as fast as I used to.

Quadriceps Are Giving Me Fits

Well, I think the Physical Therapist came close to killing me last Thursday LOL. The tops of my thighs, where the quadriceps muscles are, were so sore Friday through Sunday that it was all I could do to get in and out of the car or sit down or get up from even the handicap toilet. I spent the whole time on strong pain pills, and much of it with the hot pad in use.

So, when I went for therapy yesterday I was very quick to let her know that whatever she did Thursday was too much. She cut way back and basically just did a few warm ups and then put me on the ultrasound, electrical stimulation, and moist heat for a long time. She doesn't want me to walk at the track but every other day for one lap, avoiding the days when I have therapy. She says as weak as the quadriceps are that she's afraid I will lose my balance or start to fall. Without the quads being strong, she says I'll damage my knee. She was also surprised that I was able to walk even the quarter mile around the track once, even with the cane. She says I'm compensating in some way for the weak quads, which means I have just completely forgotten how to walk normally. I really try to do it "right," but I must not be, according to her.

She did say that the other PN patient she has is doing better, and she did give her the URL for this blog. I'm going to be disappointed if she doesn't write, as it will do me good to talk to someone who has a similar problem.

I was a good girl this morning, and only did one slow lap with the cane, concentrating on the technique for each step. Then I did my home exercises while DH walked his 2 miles. He lapped me 3 times before I could get around once! ROTFL

I go back to the Orthopedist next week, and I'll decide after I talk to him whether I should try to get an appointment with my Neurologist sooner than scheduled. I suspect he will agree with me on that. He was planning on getting an MRI of my knee once I had the PT, as that's what my insurance required before they would authorize the MRI. I am so thankful that I had this opportunity to go to Physical Therapy. It's a shame that insurance companies are so stingy with authorizing it. I can't get it for chronic conditions, so having Parkinson's Disease or Peripheral Neuropathy wouldn't get me permission. But wrenching my knee did!! Strange twisted logic - it's OK for me to fall because of weak muscles sometime in the future????

The deadline for our BLOG VILLAGE HEALTH Carnival is this Friday, but I haven't decided yet which post to enter from this blog. Too many to choose from, I guess. If you have a post you could enter, I'd appreciate your participation.

Sleep? What's That???

I'm tired. I've reached the point that I'm too tired to sleep, even when I could. I have the Ambien CR, but the Neurologist doesn't want me taking it all the time.

Besides, I might not hear Daddy if I'm doped up. He's becoming very unpredictable as to his sleeping patterns. There have been some nights lately where he hallucinated much of the night, even clawing to take off his Depends and trying to climb over the bed rails. Other nights, he talks in his sleep. I've had several lengthy conversations with him in the middle of the night, where he never opens his eyes, and I can tell he's still asleep LOL! Other nights, he barely twitches a muscle, but stays in exactly the same place all night long. That's not good for his skin.

The lift has helped with the lack of strength problem tremendously (Daddy's and mine, too), and Daddy is accepting it without argument, thank goodness. He's also letting us feed him, which surprised me. I thought he'd balk, but I think he's beyond that. He still takes spells of hateful talk, but it doesn't happen too often any more. Frances heard it for the first time yesterday. It really surprised her. We told her that meant she was part of the family now. ;)

We've reached that point in care giving where we pretty much control everything to do with Daddy now. We've bought sweat pants and put his regular zipper pants away. I've put up his watch, wallet, and keys, which he'd always put on first thing each morning. He's no longer wearing athletic undershirts or his favorite flannel shirts. We've bought him some knit Henley long sleeve shirts instead, so we could get them on and off easier that the unstretching flannels. He's in white diabetic ankle socks, instead of his dress socks, and I can't remember the last time he had on both shoes. In fact now we're not even bothering with the slipper socks, as he's not standing or walking. The sores on his bottom and his heel look much better, because we have more control over his skin now that he's not walking and in his own bed. It's no wonder he keeps asking to go home! He certainly doesn't recognize the life he's living now. But he's safe (well, except for his rail climbing times), and he's as comfortable as we can get him.

The Zelepar seems to be sufficient for my physical Parkinson's symptoms, but I'm not sure any medicine could improve the mental deterioration I see, considering all we're doing right now. Thank goodness for backspace and spell check!!

At the rate I'm going it won't be long before it's just too difficult to try to correct all my typing mistakes. I'll just join Joe, and let you see what it's really like for me HA!!

So, I've cut out what I could in the way of other responsibilities. I haven't put a new item on eBay in some time, and I've put up a notice that we are not able to ship promptly right now. I've sent an email to all the BLOG VILLAGE members, asking them to help me with the monthly check on all the voting links and dead blogs. I've even cut down on my own reading and commenting, not because I want to, but because I'm just overwhelmed right now.

As you can see, I'm not very cheery today. I'll feel better once I get some sleep, though - whenever that will be.

Cymbalta + Zelepar = BIG NO NO!!

I sent my DH to the drug store yesterday evening to pick up the prescriptions I had ordered earlier. When he brought the bag back, our local pharmacist had written a large note on it. It seems my Cymbalta and Zelepar can have a dangerous drug interaction. So, he didn't fill the Cymbalta, but told me to call my doctor.

Before calling the Neurologist, I thought I'd look up a little about this combination for myself on the Internet. Well .... I don't need to call the doctor!! Cymbalta is OUT!! Not only do the two cancel each other out, but the combination can cause something called Serotonin Syndrome/Poisoning, which can be fatal in its extreme manifestation. I have definitely had one of the milder symptoms, which I was blaming on the Zelepar, as it started after I started taking it. Out of nowhere, I would start sweating profusely and be so hot I just about couldn't stand it. I've mentioned this before, as it feels just like menopause hot flashes at their worst.

The Cymbalta prescription came from my General Practitioner, who prescribed it almost a year ago. The Neurologist had a complete list of my medications, so at least he should have known I was on it when he put me on Zelepar, which is the dissolving form of Selegiline.

So, as is so often true, it's the Pharmacist who is the expert when it comes to such interactions of medicines. This is the best argument I know of to use only one pharmacy for all prescriptions.

Zelepar is Working Much Better, Insomnia Is Still a Challenge

Evidently the reason I was not getting good results with the Zelepar was due to the strep infection. (I did get a refill on the antibiotic, so my throat continues to improve.) This time, my walking is quite normal, and so is my balance. I am taking the second dose earlier than I did last time, as I think it was one of the factors that was keeping me from sleeping. So this has been a pleasant surprise, and a welcome result.

As for sleeping, that's been, shall we say, interesting? My Neurologist did not want me to stay on the Ambien CR continuously, although he did refill the prescription. So, I figured I'd better find some other way to get some sleep. It wasn't working all that great any more, anyway.

Daddy has been taking one or two Tylenol PM for years, so I figured I'd give it a try. I tried two pills for two nights, then cut back to one pill. I was still waking up after a few hours, but went back to sleep quicker. I was getting more hours sleep with the Tylenol than I had been recently with the prescription for Ambien. Go figure. But, I felt drugged for several hours in the morning.

Time to try something else, right? I figured it was time I found out just how much sleep I would get without any sleep aid. The first night I got very little sleep, and wasn't even sleepy the next day. But after that first night, I've been sleeping just about as much as I did with the Ambien. So, I'm just going to do without, saving the Ambien CR for special situations. That way, maybe I'll get the longer sleep time, the way I did the first few nights I took it.

Strange Things Are Hapnin'

I went to my Neurologist last Friday, and I explained to him all that had been going on the whole time I was trying out the Zelepar. He agreed that the medicine had not received a fair chance at working. So, he gave me a prescription for it, with instructions to use if for a month. If I was not pleased with the way it relieved my symptoms, I could then add the Requip I have taken before back to my schedule. Now that my digestive system is behaving, I told him I thought I could handle the Requip just fine.

Of course, being the little town that ours is, our Pharmacy didn't have the Zelepar in stock. He has to order unusual medicines, but they come the next business day, and that works OK, most of the time. Of course this was Friday afternoon, when we dropped off the prescription, so I was without all weekend. I did the only thing I knew to do - I used the Requip I already had. My tummy didn't complain a bit, either.

My throat is still irritated, and I finished the antibiotic today, so I'm thinking I'll see if the nurse will swab my throat again, or just refill the prescription. I'm not convinced that the strep is gone, and I can't afford a relapse. I had rheumatic fever as a baby, so my heart is particularly vulnerable to strep infections.

I'm feeling good about the medicines Dr. S. has me on for the Parkinson's now, and I'm sure my GP will take care of my throat, so things are settling down for me.

It's just as well, because Daddy continues to decline. His arm is much better, thanks to the arm band, but his mind, and his body in general, continue to go down hill. We've had some difficulty all along getting his bowels to move, as one might expect from a 101 year old. I was using the glycerin suppositories I had to help him go, plus he is on Colace as a stool softener. The last time I used the suppository, it didn't help, which I thought was strange. So, I figured, since I use two of them, I'd use two on him. To my surprise, I discovered the first suppository still in place - not melted in the least! His body temp is so low that it didn't dissolve!!

So, even though I had been trying to put it off, I felt I had to call the Hospice Nurse, and request help giving him an enema. The enema was an ordeal for him, but it helped. That was yesterday. Today, his strength is noticeably less, and his confusion is noticeably more. His mind and body just can't cope with any kind of assault now, even if it's for his own good. Going to the Orthopedist sent him downhill, and the enema just pushed him that much further.

I can only pray that I will do well on the Zelepar, or the Zelepar and Requip combination, as I think it's clear that Daddy has taken a definite turn for the worse. In God's good time, this will all work out. I just have to take one step at a time, and leave the end results to Him.

A Clinical Trial of One??

In a real Clinical Trial, doctors use a very large number of people, usually, but not always, divided into two groups. One group gets the medicine being tested, and the other group gets fake medicine, called a placebo. At the end of the trial, if the people getting the real medicine have improved considerably more than the group getting the placebo, the medicine is assumed to be the cause of the improvement. That's a good thing!

They use such large numbers of people to conduct these trials, because there are always going to be unforeseen situations that influence the effectiveness of the medicine for some people. Maybe a few of the subjects have an undiagnosed disease that makes even the best of medicines not work. Or maybe some of them are under a lot of stress that ruins their results.

When you see a new medicine being talked about with glowing praise of its effectiveness, you have to be very cautious about getting all excited about it. I have seen reports like that where the trial only had 16 people in it. That only gives doctors a hint that a certain medicine might be helpful. It's just not enough people to tell you much.

That's the problem with trying to find the right medicine for me, or any other PWP. We are, in a very real sense, our own Clinical Trial. The last time I was on Requip, I was terribly bloated, with horrible stomach cramps and gas. So, the Neurologist took me off of it, and he put me on Zelepar. That medicine dissolved under the tongue, so it doesn't bother the digestive system. My stomach improved tremendously. The question is, was that because of the Zelepar, or was it because, that same week, my Gastroenterologist changed the prescriptions I was taking for my stomach? Also, my symptoms were not alleviated as well when I was on the Zelepar --- BUT I had strep throat most of the time I was trying it, without knowing I was that sick.

There's no way to be sure, is there, with more than one medicine being changed at the same time, and with me being sick, too? I talked with my Neurologist yesterday about this, and the fact that I had gone back to 1 Requip pill a day for several days, because I ran out of the Zelepar samples before my appointment. Even though I had been on the Requip for several days, my stomach was doing just fine.

So, Dr. S. has prescribed another month of Zelepar, to give it a fair trial at helping my PD symptoms. If I am still not getting as good a results with it as I was the Requip, I am to add the old dosage of 3 times a day of Requip to the Zelepar, which I take 2 times a day. I don't see Dr. S. for 6 more weeks, to try to give me a chance to tell what is going to work best for me.

Parkinson's Disease is different from many diseases, where there is some MRI or blood test that will tell the doctor what is helping, and what is not. With PD, it really is up to me. I have to be the judge for myself if the Neurologist has prescribed the right medicine and the right dosage. Then he bases my prescriptions on his vast experience with many other PWP he has treated.

But it still boils down to a Clinical Trial of one - ME!

Tummy Improvement OR Walking Faster?

I've been on the new Zelepar medicine for several days now, and my digestive system is behaving just fine. I don't seem to be getting quite as much help with my gait as I did with the Requip or Sinemet, however, but I'm still on the samples. When I go back to the Neurologist next Friday, it may be that he will order a prescription for a higher dose or more doses, which might make the difference. Anyway, even if the dose stays where it is now, it seems like a reasonable trade off between stomach problems and balance and walking problems. I'd love to walk better, but I can live with it the way it is now, if I have to. It's nice not to spend part of every day miserable, with a hot pad on my tummy!

I said at first the Zelepar didn't taste bitter, however, I'd better amend that evaluation. Yes, it is bitter, but not enough to bother me, anyway. (The trick is to be sure you place it under, not on, the tongue.) It dissolves under my tongue so quickly that it's just a few seconds, and I can swallow it. You're not allowed to drink or eat anything for at least 5 minutes before or after taking it, but my saliva quickly washes the taste away.

We're still staying with my Daddy, which means I spend most of my days and every night in a hot house. We tried to find a compromise temperature for the thermostat, but at 101, he gets too cold, while we're still sweltering. I have noticed that I'm having more trouble with the heat this week, since I've been on the Zelepar, than I was before I started taking it. I'm getting what feels exactly like hot flashes several times a day, and I've been past that stage for some time now. I have read that Parkinson's can mess with the body's regulation of internal temperature, so I guess that's what's happening to me right now. Or is it because of the Zelepar? I really don't know.

I was on Requip before starting the Zelepar. Requip is a dopamine agonist, but Zelepar is an MAO-inhibitor, so they don't attack the PD symptoms the same way. There's big news in the Birmingham News today that a doctor at UAB is close to getting FDA approval for a patch version of a dopamine agonist. That will be good news for me, as the Requip did a better job of improving my balance and walking than it looks like the MAO-inhibitors are going to. I'm all for any PD med that I don't have to swallow!! So this is something else for me to be hopeful about.

It's great to see that there is good news on the horizon for the large number of people who really suffer with this disease. My own symptoms and discomfort level are so mild compared to people who have had Parkinson's for years. I pray that all this new research may bring them relief in the near future, instead of years from now.

First Dose of Zelepar, My New Parkinson's Medicine!

This is the day I have been waiting for for about two weeks now. I spent that time tapering off of the Requip I had been on, went without any PD medicine yesterday, and this morning I took the first dose of Zelepar.

Zelepar is a quick dissolving tablet form of Selegiline, which dissolves under the tongue. It tasted a little like an orange mint might to me, but it does dissolve extremely fast. There was also a little tingle on the tongue, but nothing uncomfortable. I had read somewhere on the Internet that it tasted bitter, but, for me at least, that was not so. The directions emphasized not to drink any liquids or eat anything at least 5 minutes before or after taking it. I'll be taking it twice a day while I'm on the samples, but I'm to go back to the Neurologist at the end of this two week trial.

I felt my walking begin to smooth out within about 30 minutes. It may be my imagination, but I think it's made me a little hyper, too. (Of course, I've been so slow the last two weeks it may be I'm just normal now.) I'll have to be careful when I take the evening dose, if that's so, or I won't get any sleep tonight. LOL

I've been reading the explanations of what a MAO-inhibitor is, which is the class of drugs that Selegiline falls in, and I think I've got it figured out. Basically, it's some kind of high powered targeted anti-oxidant, that keeps the smaller amount of dopamine that my brain is making from being broken down prematurely. So I'm getting the full benefit of what my brain is naturally producing.

There is also some research that suggests that Selegiline may actually protect the part of the brain that makes dopamine, and possibly slow down the progression of this disease! If you're not really familiar with Parkinson's Disease, that may not sound so significant, but it would be quite a break through. All the other meds treat symptoms only. There is a possibility that Selegiline may effect the cause of Parkinson's!! I'll not go so far as to get my hopes up for that, but you bet I'll be watching to see if that turns out to be true.

Tapering Off Requip

When I went to my Neurologist last Tuesday, we decided I would stop taking the Requip, since it was probably the cause of all my stomach problems, other than the PD itself. Also, it was the likely culprit for my hair loss. So, Dr. S. told me to taper off the Requip before I changed over to the samples of Zelepar he gave me. That meant last week I only had two pills a day, instead of the usual three. Starting Tuesday of this week, I've only been taking one a day.

Dopamine is the brain chemical that controls muscle movement, and that's the one that people with Parkinson's no longer make enough of. Requip tricks the brain into accepting the chemical in it as a substitute for the dopamine, so it's called a dopamine agonist. Now that I'm down to one pill a day, I can really tell it! My balance is terrible, and my walking is stilted and jerky.

As long as DH can take over the care giving tasks I'm not up to, I'll continue to do as much as I can to help Daddy. We've only got to make it until next Wednesday, and then I can start taking the new medicine. Zelepar, a special form of the medicine called Selegiline, is a different type of Parkinson's medicine entirely. It is an MAO-inhibitor. I've read what that means a dozen times now, but I still don't understand it well enough to put it in my own words LOL.

The reason Dr. S. is trying this particular prescription is that it dissolves on the tongue and does not go through my digestive system. It goes straight into the blood stream. With the improvement in stomach comfort that I'm seeing from the Miralax and glycerin suppository combination, I'm hoping this new medicine will be the perfect one for me for the time being.

I do know that at some point I will have to go back to taking Sinemet, which was the first medicine I took. It nauseated me, too, but I'll cross that bridge when I get to it, because there is a patch form of it in drug trials now.

So for the next few days I'll be weaving and lurching around here like I'm drunk, but I can put up with it, knowing there's something new to try just days away. I am ever thankful to God that there are so many researchers working to find new ways of fighting the symptoms of this disease, working on ways to slow its progress down, and ultimately to cure it.

So I'm Stopping the Requip

I went to my Neurologist today, and we discussed my digestive problems, hair loss LOL, and insomnia. His solution was to taper off the Requip until I have quit taking it completely and see what happens to my stomach problems. He also gave me a prescription for a time release version of Ambien. And, of course, if it was the Requip that was causing the hair loss, stopping the Requip will take care of that situation.

I told him about writing to the National Parkinson's Foundation "Ask the Doctor" site, and what that doctor suggested. So he's given me some samples of the medicine the NPF doctor suggested I try. I'm not supposed to use it until I've completely stopped the Requip, if I can possibly stand it. But I explained we were taking care of my Daddy, and I might not be able to put up with my impaired walking that long. He wants me to try, so he can get a fair assessment of how the new medicine works, but he does understand our situation.

He gave me samples of Zelepar, one of the brand names of Selegiline. It dissolves on the tongue, so it does not go through the digestive system at all, but straight into the blood stream. I have high hopes for this medicine. It is also a different type of medicine than I have had before. This one is an MAO inhibitor. I'll have to do some research to fully understand what that means.

I am very thankful that all the research over the last few years means there are a lot more different types of medicines for him to try on me than there used to be for Parkinson's. None of them slow down the disease, or do anything at all to cure it, but they do help with the symptoms. For now, that is a blessing. Hopefully, in my lifetime, they will find ways of at least slowing the disease down. And who knows, maybe they'll even find a cure.

The Ole Brain's Missing it's Sleep!!

Today more than any day so far I've been able to tell that my mental sharpness has dulled from lack of sleep. I can't count how many strange mistakes in thinking I've made today. DH has sent me home for a couple of hours to try to decompress from whatever tension I might be feeling at Daddy's house, but it just doesn't seem to be enough to do any good. What I really need is a good night's rest.

The really strange part is that I'm not in the least sleepy! I'm not hyper, either. I feel perfectly normal, until I do something really, really stupid, and then I wonder where did that come from. But I really know where it's coming from. I just don't know what to do about it.

I go to the Neurologist Tuesday, so I'll try to last on the sleep the Ambien gives me until then.

Daddy was stronger this morning, and his own barber came over and cut his hair, which pleased him immensely. But he's been sleeping in his chair literally all day today. So whatever happened yesterday morning has taken its toll on him again, evidently.

I continue to battle the digestive problems, trying to follow the new instructions from Dr. B today. No real change, yet, but it's too soon to expect any difference, really.

Seeing My Doctors Sooner

I was quite surprised to not only be able to get an appointment with my Gastroenterologist this Friday, but I was also able to get one with my Neurologist next Tuesday. The Neurologist appointment really surprised me, as I know how long I've had to wait before to get one. I must have lucked up on one somebody had canceled, but I'm thankful for it, regardless of how I got it.

I'm hoping that, between the two appointments, a definite solution to my stomach problems can be found, and I also need to have a different sleep aide prescription besides Ambien.

The Friday appointment won't be a problem, because Frances comes on Friday's anyway, but I'm just keeping my fingers crossed that she can come on Tuesday. She's out of town right now, so I'll have to call tomorrow to work out the details. If she can't, then I'll have to start calling church members to find somebody who can sit with Daddy for us.

I want to thank you, friends, who put up with my daily moans and groans, to give me an encouraging word. I really need that encouragement right now. Our situation with Daddy has settled into pretty much of a routine, but there are still a lot of questions about what the future will hold. It's hard to imagine that he will recuperate from this episode and be able to live by himself again. But I keep reminding myself that he's "graduated" from Hospice once before. He really is amazing! Cantankerous, but amazing!!!

Same-o Same-o

I did go to church Sunday morning, which was a pleasantly normal thing to do, but my stomach acted up, as usual, so I really didn't get to enjoy the afternoon. I did get a good bit of rest, though, which I certainly needed, but I'm still not getting more than a few hours sleep at night. The Ambien just isn't working for me.

Today has been pretty much a repeat of many others, with the accompanying stomach bloating and cramps. I'm being just as careful as I can with what I eat, and I'm not having any bathroom problems, so I have to conclude that this is due to the Parkinson's itself. Just like my legs were moving so slowly before I was on medicine, evidently my digestive system muscles are also moving very slowly. The regular Parkinson's meds don't work on these involuntary muscles. That's what the Zelnorm is supposed to be helping, but I don't really think it is. And, thanks to how lousy I'm feeling, I'm losing a good bit of weight.

So it looks like I'll be moving my Gastroenterologist and Neurologist appointments up sooner, if possible, as I've had about as much of this stomach trouble as I want to put up with.

Ahhh To Sleep, Perchance to Dream

Thank goodness for Ambien. I called my Neurologist's nurse yesterday and explained the situation with Daddy. She called in the prescription, and I had a good night's sleep last night, for the first time in a week. Whew!! That felt good.

It will take me a few days to get over being so tired, I expect, but getting a good night's sleep will make a world of difference in what I can accomplish without being totally exhausted. Maybe I can even get back to practicing my Tai Chi in Daddy's living room. After going to all that trouble to learn it again, I sure don't want to forget it. And it's good for my balance and stamina, too.

I've been reading some articles lately that say Pilates is good for PWP (people with Parkinson's), so that may be the next thing I look into. I haven't been able to figure out from what I've read if these were specially modified Pilates classes or not. Of course, it would make a big difference if they were. Speaking of PWP, I've also found that Parkinson's folks call themselves Parkies. Ain't that cute? So I'm a PWP and a Parkie now.

One of the Hospice people tried unsuccessfully several times yesterday afternoon to call us from her cell phone. We live in the middle of nowhere, as far as cell coverage is concerned. "Can you hear me now" just won't work out here. In fact, we had Verizon, and dropped it, because we couldn't get it to work at all LOL. She never did come, and we never did get to talk to her, either.

I'm considering ordering DSL for here, so I don't have to depend on my cell phone while I'm on the computer. Plus, for some reason, the program our church uses for editing our website just won't let me FTP from here on dialup. It works fine at the house on DSL. I'm the church webmaster, and that has to be updated weekly.

As you may be able to tell, I'm in a pretty good mood today. It's been over a week since he fell, and we've developed somewhat of a routine. Now that I know I will be able to sleep, I feel like we can handle whatever comes, between the two of us. We've had plenty of care giving experience, and we have Hospice for support. Our daughters and church family will help where they can, and we have our faith in God to hold us in the good and the bad times. What more could we ask.

Your prayers and kind thoughts are always appreciated, too. The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much!

The New Normal is Settling In

We're getting into something of a routine around here, so things are beginning to settle down. DH has been coming up each morning and helping in any way he can, as I get Daddy up and dressed, and we get breakfast going. Hospice has left the wheelchair, a bedside table, an emergency oxygen tank, and one of those oxygen maker machines that plugs in, for when we eventually need it. The bath lady comes out today, too. And his medicine should be coming via FedEx today, also.

We're taking turns going home for a few hours during the day, so I can take care of our Internet business and get packages ready to ship. And I can play with our cat for a bit, too. We live right down the street, so it's not that big a deal.

With all that settling down, my PD symptoms have come under control again, I'm happy to say. My only continuing problem is the lack of sleep, and I've given that long enough to get under control naturally. I'm calling the Neurologist today and see what he can prescribe, as I can't possibly continue at this rate indefinitely.

DH scrubbed and mopped the kitchen floor and brought our good vacuum cleaner up here last night, so we could give the carpets a good cleaning, too. We've got the time to do it, so we'll gradually get the house cleaned up. We've had to neglect it this last year, what with our daughter being in the hospital so much and then me being so sick. Daddy has always vetoed any suggestions at paying someone to come in and clean. Because he's blind, he really doesn't like strangers in the house, and I can understand that.

I'm not sure yet if we'll try to find some part time help to give us a day off or two, since Daddy is so uncomfortable with that. It really depends on how much we need it. We have to take care of ourselves, too, and time away from all this is part of that process.

All's Well with My World!! Glory to God!!

I went to the Neurologist Thursday morning, and reported to him about the Endoscopy and Monday's visit to the Gastroenterologist. I told him about the Zelnorm, and how it is definitely helping. I also told him about the hair loss, and he said if it continues he'll try to help with it on my next visit. He agreed that it was time to take me off the Sinemet YAY!, and go on just the Requip, which is what I was hoping he would do. So I don't see him again for three whole months! I feel like a free woman!!! Requip is taken with meals, so no more of this hour ahead stuff, and it doesn't have any dietary restrictions, either, so I can eat what I want with it. My gastro doctor has put enough restrictions on my diet as it is, so I'm glad to not have more added to those from the PD meds.

Thursday was my DH's birthday, but I couldn't get him to spend any money on himself at all. I was hoping there would be a movie he wanted to see, but no such luck. Then I tried to get him to buy a book or a CD, but he wouldn't do that, either. So.... I needed to get a pair of walking shoes, fitted by a knowledgeable salesperson, something I had researched on the Internet as being good for Parkinson's patients, so we ended up spending money on ME LOL. He did let me take him out for a nice lunch, though.

I found out in my research that walking shoes don't break on the sole in the same place that running shoes do. Since PD folks have problems picking up the foot and putting it down properly, with the roll that everyone else takes for granted, this is important. I was used to wearing running shoes, and I could tell the difference immediately. It really felt odd, and will take some getting used to. It changed my whole sense of balance at first, I was so used to the old shoes.

So this is a post I've been looking forward to making. I'm feeling good about my medicines, my stomach is improving, and I'm at a point where I feel like I have a handle on the Parkinson's for now. Now I just want to proceed with life as normally as possible for as long as possible, enjoying every minute of it, knowing that the time will come when things will change. I feel so fortunate that this disease is progressing slowly for me. This warning time gives me the opportunity to glory in just being alive, and I thank God for every minute of it.

Still Puny Today

I wasn't as sick today as I was yesterday evening, I don't think, but I still felt pretty rotten today. I really didn't feel like trying to go to church this morning, and we didn't have the service at our church this evening, because it was the Fifth Sunday Singing. That rotates around among the churches in the area, and I wouldn't have gone to that, anyway.

I've tried to do the research on the Internet today, to decide if it's the Sinemet or the Requip doing it, since I got sick Saturday, after I had upped the dose of Requip on Friday. The dose is pretty good sized now, so it may be the Requip. That makes me think I need to call the Neurologist, rather than the Gastroenterologist, in the morning. I don't think I can wait until my Thursday appointment. I'm losing weight awfully fast, because I'm really eating very little. I just don't feel like putting anything in my stomach right now. It's much too uncomfortable. And I'm getting weak again, too.

I'll be glad when this whole medicine regimen is worked out, and my digestive system settles down!!

Oh, another side effect is definitely showing up. I've suspected it for some time, but now I've let enough time go by to be sure -- I'm beginning to lose my hair. I wear it really short anyway, so it's not going to be long before it's noticeable on top. But this is a vanity issue, and doesn't effect my ability to eat or move or anything important, so I can live with it, even though it would have been nice if this particular side effect had passed me by.

Results of Endoscopy and Ultrasound

Yesterday I had the Endoscopy and Ultrasound to try to determine why I'm having such a terrible time with the acid reflux. I've been diagnosed with GERD now for several years, so I generally know what I can and cannot eat. I really thought it was the Sinemet that set off the reflux, but my Gastroenterologist wanted to be sure it wasn't a lingering infection from the severe colitis I had been plagued with for so long.

Anyway, the tests showed nothing but irritation, not infection, and no sign of gall stones or anything like that, so it was the medicine after all. My own doctor had been called away, and one of his associates, who is not familiar with my case, did the endoscopy. His orders were to take the Parkinson's meds with meals, which, of course, I'm not supposed to do. He also prescribed Carafate and a week's worth of probiotics, and to continue the twice a day on Protonix. All this is designed to settle down my tummy and soothe my esophagus.

As for taking the PD meds with meals, I'm not going to do that, but I do eat crackers with them each time, to try to protect my stomach. Hopefully, by the time I'm weaned off the Sinemet and fully titrated onto the Requip, I won't have the conflict with the meds, anyway.

If I still have problems then, I'll have to try to get the Neurologist and the Gastroenterologist to talk to each other and decide what's best for me. I don't like being the go-between for doctors. They need to discuss this with each other!

I had read that Parkinson's meds and Parkinson's itself could cause a person to react differently to anesthesia. Well, there may be some truth to that. I slept until 6:30 PM yesterday evening after we got home from the endoscopy, and then I went back to sleep about 10:00 and slept all night until around 6:30 this morning!! I just about lost yesterday!! I'm fine today, with no ill effects at all.

My Prayers Have Been Answered!!

I've been going to doctors for years with strange symptoms that came and went, that they never could explain. Most of them were attributed to stress, which made sense, but I was never satisfied with the diagnosis. Today, the Neurologist officially gave us the diagnosis of Parkinson's Disease, and even though that can mean years of debilitating illness, it doesn't have to be that way. Every PD patient is different. I'm just so relieved to have an explanation for what's been happening to me, particularly for the last year, that I have been celebrating all day long. Now I have an enemy I can fight!!!

Doctor S has given me the directions today for weaning off of the Sinemet and changing over to Requip, which is a dopamine agonist. There's no way of knowing if I will be able to use it instead, without trying it, so the next 4 weeks will be another trial. Sinemet is the gold standard of PD meds, but it only works for a limited number of years, before the side effects cause as much trouble as the PD does. So they try to delay starting "younger" patients like me on it, if they can help it. (I don't call 63 younger LOL)

We also asked about exercise, and he said for me to walk for 30 minutes a day for 4 days a week. From my reading I've found that Tai Chi is good for Parkinson's patients, and I've already had some training. I went to the gym on the way home today and talked to the Sensei about giving me some private lessons two days a week for 30 minutes to help me build my balance and stamina again. And Dr. S said I need to do some weight bearing exercise, too, so I'll be getting back on the mini trampoline, too.

Today is a new beginning for me in a very real sense, and I thank God that I have been diagnosed early, so I have time to improve my health as much as I possibly can. I thank you all for your prayers.

Tummy's Been Worse

I ended up calling the Neurologist's call service, as stomach cramps have joined the nausea, even though I've been super careful with what I've eaten today. I've had crackers with the Sinemet, too, but nothing's helping.

I was extremely impressed with how quickly I got a call back from the doctor on call this weekend. He's phoned in a prescription to our pharmacy, on the chance they leave an answering machine on when they're not open. I'm to call the drugstore in the morning to see if they got the message. If not, I'll have to phone the doctor's office in the morning, and they'll call in the prescription. All this rigamarole, because we live in a little town that's lucky to even have a drugstore at all, even if it is closed at night and on the weekend.

In the meantime, he told me to not take any more Sinemet until I get this new medicine. I will be taking it with each dose of Sinemet from now on. He said the name of the med, but I forgot it by the time I got off the phone.

Developing Our Plan of Attack

In order to understand my approach to having a chronic illness, you need to know a little about me and my side of the family. My grandmother had and my Daddy has Macular Degeneration. My Daddy has been legally blind now for over 30 years, gradually losing more and more of his sight, but never doing anything to prepare himself for being blind.

I've said for years that if I were ever diagnosed with the beginnings of MD, I'd immediately start learning Braille and take classes on how to take care of myself from a low vision standpoint.

My approach to any illness is to search the Internet for every bit of information I can find. I have a Chemistry major, with a strong background in Biology and Biochemistry, so the technical papers usually make at least some sense to me.

With that said, it shouldn't be so surprising that I've spent almost all this week researching everything I can find about Parkinson's Disease. I've found bits and pieces of information on various sites that I've bookmarked for myself, but the links that have the most information, presented clearly, I'll be listing in the right hand column.

DH and I are working together, bouncing ideas around as we try to understand how to balance the medicine with the foods that interfere with the medicine, but are necessary for good health. I did my first set of the PD exercises today, and DH bought a different cereal for me, based on the nutrition information I found.

By the time I see the Neurologist again, I should have a good idea what I need to ask him about. Of course I'm still assuming the DX is going to be PD, but at least I feel like I'm doing something besides waiting for the next appointment.

If I Could Dance ... I Would!!!

I went to the Neurologist today, and I feel like I had a very productive visit this time. He is agreeing with the diagnosis of Peripheral Neuropathy, but he thinks something else is going on at the same time, as not all my symptoms seem to fit that diagnosis. First of all, the heavy metals test came back negative, so we don't have to worry about the EPA site, at least. All the other blood tests came back OK, too. One test is having to be done again, as the lab goofed on that one.

Anyway, he's given me a prescription for Sinemet to take for three weeks and then see him again to see if it makes a difference in my walking. This is a Parkinson's medicine, which is what I've thought he was thinking all along, since Mama had Parkinson's. She didn't have tremors, and I've only had some shakiness when I was weakened by the colitis or really tired.

I finally feel like I'm getting somewhere!!! At least in 3 weeks we'll know if it's Parkinson's or something similar, and I really think it is. I'm looking forward to being able to walk better. I know I shouldn't be getting my hopes up so, but right now I'm almost ecstatic!

Looking Forward to Doctor's Appt. Tomorrow!

I've been able to stay busy this last week, and the time has really flown by, thank goodness. I've had plenty of excercise, so the weakness in my legs is definitely not from lack of use from the extended illness I had with the colitis attack. And I'm off all the steroid capsules, too, which means I've only got two more pills to go and I'll be off all the colitis meds.

Tomorrow we find out the results of all the lab tests they ran on me this last week. We also find out if I have to have a repeat of the EMG tests, because the last doctor did not test any upper body areas. Since I do get trembly sometimes in my hands, I'm hoping he'll do the test again, even though it's certainly NOT a fun test. I've already told him I'd do it again in a heartbeat if he needs me to. He knows how uncomfortable the test is and is trying to spare me that, if possible, but I want whatever will give the most accurate diagnosis, discomfort or not.

I just hope tomorrow's appointment doesn't end up leaving me feeling disappointed that things are moving too slowly, the way last time's did. I really like this Neurologist, and I have full confidence in his abilities, so I'll just have to put my trust in God that he has led me to the right man.

I had my first experience with someone trying to help me when I didn't need their help tonight. I was getting ready to go down the steps at church, which means DH takes the walker and I hold on to the railing and carefully take one step at a time. One of the church ladies grabbed my free hand to help me, and she really was trying to insist on helping, even though I kept telling her I would be just fine. It surprised me that I found that very irritating. I must remember to ask if I can help someone, instead of assuming they need my help.

Diagnosis is Taking Too Loooooong!!!

I went to the Neurologist again yesterday, and was disappointed with the visit, to tell the truth. I know he's a busy man, because we purposefully picked the very best Neurologist we could get. But I feel like he's so busy that this whole process of diagnosing is dragging on interminably, because the appointments are so far apart, and so little seems to be accomplished each time I see him. It's that last part that has me disappointed.

He wanted us to get the full study from the doctor who did the EMG, so he could read through it. If his nurse had called us prior to yesterday's visit, we could already have gotten it, and he could have had that already done. As it is, he still doesn't know if he will want me to undergo that test again, so I'm feeling very frustrated. We went and got the report and brought it straight back to Dr. S's office, and I have another appointment in two weeks.

He did say, after looking at the MRI that we had taken to him of my last lumbar vertebrae series, that he now agrees with the Orthopedic doctor that my Peripheral Neuropathy was not caused by my Degenerative Disk Disease. So, it's not my brain, and it's not my back.

He had a lot of blood tests done, and I have to do a 24 hour urine catch on Sunday/Monday and return the jug to the lab Monday. That's to test for heavy metals, since we do live within a quarter of a mile of an EPA toxic waste site that's cleaned up now, but we lived here many of the years the factory was in operation.

It's looking more and more like he thinks I have Parkinson's, even though I'm not exhibiting a lot of the typical symptoms.

Of course, I'm still holding out that it's just from all the stress I've been under and still am under. I'm writing this post from my 101 year old Daddy's house. He usually stays by himself, and I come in to fix breakfast and supper. Meals on Wheels brings lunch. We call him during the day, and that is usually enough, but he was awfully weak this morning and hurting in his back, so I've stayed with him today, and I'll spend the night here.

This whole business of every step feeling like I was dragging my feet through molasses started sometime last October, but our DD was in the hospital then, and I was staying with her, so I put off doing anything about it until March. The epidurals the Orthopedic Dr. prescribed did a great job of getting rid of the pain, but the walking did not improve. So here I am, and it's September, almost a year later, and I'm still wading through mud with every step. Let's just say my patience is wearing pretty thin.

A Truly Normal Saturday!

For the first time since the end of March, I got out my digital camera and took a series of pictures of an item to put on eBay last night. That's the first time I've touched that camera in all this time. I don't think I could have held it steady much sooner than now, as I was so weakened by my bout of colitis. Anyway, it felt good to actually get a new listing up again, and I plan to get at least one up each day from now on, and hopefully two most days.

My strength has improved some, what with all the exercise I've been doing, but my walking is still very shaky. I have a Neurologist appointment this week, and I'm really looking forward to that. I've been really patient, and I'm praying that this will be the time for all the tests that will help him figure out what's wrong with me.

I am so very thankful to God for my DH, who has been so attentive and so supportive through all these months. I don't know what I would have done without him. I don't know how people, who don't have Jesus to hold onto, make it through the scary times that life can throw their way,either.

Uncle Bill

I need to remember to tell Dr. S about Uncle Bill, Mama's brother, because he died of Lou Gehrig's Disease. I know that's not what I have, but he still needs to know it. Mama was originally diagnosed with Parkinson's, which I did tell him, but that was later changed to Alzheimer's Disease. Trouble is, she never did have the tremors. Now that I've seen what a real Neurologist does in the way of diagnostic testing, I don't think that first diagnosis of Parkinson's was even valid for Mama. It may well be that I have the same thing she had. That remains to be seen, but it just may be that this is genetic.

A Personal Journal

I've been waiting for six weeks to see Dr. S to find out what he thinks is wrong with my legs. I tried to remember everything I could that he might possibly need to know about my past history. I still forgot to tell him about the Bolt Factory and the functional dysphonia diagnosis I had before I quit teaching. I also forgot to tell him that I taught Chemistry for a few years, but I really don't think that has anything to do with it at all. I did give his nurse my notes about that when we took the old back films to them. But I'm still forgetting to tell them about Uncle Bill!!

He did the kinds of hammering around that I expected and said that I definitely had diminished responses in my legs, but the upper body responses seemed normal. He was sorry that the EMG I had already had did not include any tests of the upper body and wants to repeat that test. He watched me walk, asked DH if I were that slow with everything I did, which I'm not. I did tell him I feel the shakes at times with my hands. I definitely have trouble handling pills and money, and my memory is not as good as it used to be, either, but then I'm not as young as I used to be, either.

I told him about the MRI Dr. Stan had done years ago that showed increased CSF pressure and the negative Babinski test, so he wants a repeat of the brain MRI.

He showed us what a Parkinson's walk typically looks like, and that's not what I'm doing. I'm not walking like the typical Peripheral Neuropathy either, so that's the puzzle of it. I told him about my concerns that it might be psychosomatic from worrying about DD so much and being with her through all her PN hospitalizations. He said that would be the diagnosis of last resort, if I understood him correctly.

Anyway, now I'm trying to be patient while HealthSpring takes their beaurocratic time processing the request for a brain MRI and a repeat of the EMG to include the upper body as well. He wants to do a series of blood tests, too, to check for B12 deficiency and toxic metals I'm guessing.

I liked him and I have confidence in him.